Life in the Fish Bowl

A view of life in the bowl

By: Dr. Jeff Fuller

The pastor’s home has been compared to a Fish Bowl.  If you have ever had fish or been around an elaborate fish tank, you are drawn to it life an ant to sugar.  You will sit and watch as the little fish swim in an out of the little rock formations at the bottom, while the larger fish in bright colors circle the tank, stopping every so often to look back.

I thought about this while reading some little stories and jokes recently on the humor we find in the pastor’s home.  The parsonage is a place where many find some truly funny and unusual things.

The minister’s wife was a wonder at conserving food and rarely had to throw away a bit of it.  At one meal she serve her pastor husband nothing but leftovers that the parson viewed with disdain.  He began to pick at the food, causing his wife to say, “Dear, you forgot the blessing.”

“Listen, sweetheart, if you show me one item that hasn’t been blessed at least two times, I can’t see what another prayer can do for it.”

Three boys were in the church yard bragging about their fathers.  The first boy declares, “My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper; he calls it a poem, and they give him fifty dollars.”

The second boy says, “That’s nothing, my Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper; he calls it a song, and they give him one hundred dollars.”

Little Johnny says, “I got you both beat.  My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper; he calls it a sermon, and it takes eight people to carry all the money.”

That one’s good, but there is another variation.  I wish to share it with you.

Three boys were sitting around on the porch one day, bragging about how rich their Dad’s were.

The first boy said, “My Dad is a wonder attorney.  His hourly fee is three hundred dollars an hour.  He can take a case and make thousands off of the poor person he is representing.  He owns two businesses, three houses, and a time share in Florida.”

The second boy pipes up, “My Dad is a skilled surgeon and patients come from all over the country to see him and get his opinion.  He has written several books, we own three race horses, and have an interest in three hotels and four condos.”

The last boy said, “I got all of you beat.”

The other two were astonished as one of them said, “How can you?  Your Dad is the preacher and you all live in a house owned by the church.   There is no way you days has more than our Dad have.”

“I know,” the preachers son said, “But Dad came home from a meeting last night and said, ‘They gave me hell.’”

Pastor Smith had a long season with the dentist one Monday afternoon, having all of his teeth pulled and a set of dentures installed and was back in the pulpit the following Lord’s Day.

The first Sunday he preached ten minutes.

The second Sunday he preached twenty minutes.

But on the third Sunday he preached for an hour and a half.

When some of the members asked about the time variations, he responded: “The first Sunday, my gums were so sore it hurt to talk.  The second Sunday, my dentures were hurting a lot.  The third Sunday, I accidental grabbed my wife’s dentures-and I couldn’t stop talking.”

Every evening the Reverend Phillips family gathered together for a Bible story and prayer.  One evening, the story was about Lot and his wife escaping from Sodom and Gomorrah.  As all know, the great climax of the narrative is when Mrs. Lot looks back and turns into a pillar of salt.

The story sat well with Tommy, who raised his hand the second the sotry was over and told his father, “That’s like when mom was driving home in the car; she looked back at Rachel and me and turned into a telephone pole.”

A minister from the city was filling the pulpit in a small community.  After the service he was invited over to the house of one of the members for lunch.  In the course of the conversation, he talked about his family back home, and how his son won first place in the one hundred-yard dash.

“I know how you must feel,” declared the man of the house.  “I remember how pleased we were last year when our pig got the blue ribbon at the fair.”

Yes, viewing the preacher’s house and family is a great deal akin to looking at fishing in a fish bowl.  We watch them as they go about their daily activities and find something along the way to comment about or quip about, or even laugh about.  But let us always, without fail remember the encouragement from the Word: “The elders who are good leaders should be considered worthy of an ample honorarium, especially those who work hard at preaching and teaching. For the Scripture says: You must not muzzle an ox that is threshing grain, and, The laborer is worthy of his wages.” (1 Tim 5:17-18 HCSB)

Just remember one thing: While you are looking in on the preacher, he is looking out and sees everything.

Until next time…